My Grandmother's Story ⚘ - by Talia

 My grandmother told me she wasn't well this morning. She scratched the inside of her throat yesterday. She choked on her lunch.

"I am greedy," she said. "I wanted to eat all my food quickly." She wanted to eat everything but it was becoming more painful for her to chew.  Then she added, "I wanted to talk with my friends so I think I must eat quickly. I don't chew." She doesn’t eat well with her friends. 

 

Not so long ago I would scratch my palate on biscuits and crackers. I wanted just one but greed would come. I would scoff it down without chewing or tasting much ~ and so I kept wanting to eat more. My stomach hurt often. 

 

"Stop following your desires," my Teacher said to me. I wanted to follow her but I also wanted to feed my desires. Then one day she said, "then just do what you want." I couldn't even do that. I wanted to do what she had said before; I wanted to do well. But once more I was saying ‘No’ and I didn't recognize it. 

 

This last time it was different. As she spoke, I said ‘Yes, everything you say is true and I will follow you and do as I want’. The next morning I followed my thinking. I watched how I had no understanding about the postures, about things I thought I knew. I noticed how my thinking is wrong. 

"Every time you think 'I know', drop it," my Teacher had said before. 

neti neti

It is not this. It is not that.

 

Then what to do?

"Just do what you want," my Teachers said almost in unison.

What do I want?

I want to go towards Enlightenment. I am devoted to the path of Yoga.

Master said that as long as you are devoted to something the object doesn't matter. I can have trust in my Teachers. I can have trust in Yoga. I can have trust in a bottle of Coke Cola (funny one)! Then I must practice Yoga, and that does not mean following my mind because Yoga is the cessation of mind. PRACTICE IS not what I want to do, it is what my Teacher says to do.

Yes!

And Thank you Gran for reminding me to watch my greed and desires; for reminding me to be patient. I hope you feel better soon! I love you lots!!

 

Let's chew slowly this weekend. Eating can be meditation.

Taste all of life! [not just this weekend].